Two Worlds Connected

Every time I sit here and begin these blog entries, I can’t help but look back to the last time I took the time to write. At first, I feel a little guilty as I realize, again, that too many months have passed since my last entry. Then, I think, “What have you been doing that you couldn’t step away to reflect on life at the Finca?” Usually, I decide that it has just been due to my lack of taking time, and this time it is the same. However, I genuinely can say that the past several months have been jammed packed with busy-ness, but they have been so beautifully packed that I hope you all will be able to forgive me for my lack of communication.

Today, I am sitting here in my living room back in Pittsfield while I am on a couple weeks vacation in the States. As I expected, being back home has given me a lot of time to reflect on my life in Honduras as I have had time to share my experiences and the lives of our kids with family and friends. I must admit there were more than a few challenging moments in the months leading up to my vacation in which I doubted that I would want to return back to the Finca after coming back home. I am not searching for pity when I say that our life at the Finca is challenging, non-stop, and often leaves me wondering if I made the right decision to volunteer there. But once again, I have been graced by what I would like to think is God’s love. Being home has in fact done the opposite. It has made me so grateful for all the amazing love and support of my family friends back here in the States, but it has also made me realize that my current life is in fact back on that beautiful Caribbean coast with the amazingly beautiful faces of our kids and Finca community! And, I think better yet that coming home to visit will actually enhance my experience in Honduras as my life at the Finca now seems more “real” and connected to my life here in the States. My two worlds have finally been connected a little more concretely.

Having said all of this, I think I should actually share some of the beautiful moments I have experienced in the past months, so here I go…

Back around the beginning of March, due to some unexpected events (which really should be thought of as expected events because unexpected happenings are really the norm at the Finca!), I took on being the social worker of Casa 4 (our “middle-aged” boys house, 6 boys ages 10-14) in addition to my two girls’ homes. It quickly became very clear why social workers are normally only given two houses to keep track of. Balancing time between 18 kids and supporting three sets of houseparents and tias is not an easy task. I wouldn’t say I exactly mastered it either. However, I took the only approach one can take at the Finca and just tried to do the best I could.

Working with these boys made me realize that up until that time, I really had spent most of my time at the Finca with our girls. Sure I say hello to everyone I cross, but saying hello really isn’t investing in someone. It was so great to be “forced” (though that isn’t the best word to describe it) to spend some quality time with them and a lot of fun. Like all of our kids, these boys just thirst for any attention anyone is willing to give. Whether it was putting together puzzles, swimming in the ocean, playing Old Maid, doing homework, or just talking, the boys were usually so ready and willing to take part. Of course some of the boys are more willing than others. But those “tough” kids are really the ones that teach you how to be patient and persistent in building relationships. Though I am happy that when I return to the Finca I will be back to having only my two girls’ houses, it was a true joy to spend some quality time with some of our boys and a great encouragement to balance my time a little better between all of our children.

Another beautiful experience has been watching the continuing adjustment of our newer kids at the Finca. After a little over 3 months at the Finca, the family of four girls that arrived at the beginning of March and who were placed in my houses are doing well. They are such great girls full of life, emotion, and an eagerness to belong. I don’t think you could find a more different, but connected group of sisters. Marina, 14, is quiet (until she gets to know you), funny, hard-working, and loves to help others. Riccy, 12, is opinionated, strong-willed, hilarious, and a friend to all. Belgia, 9, and Belkis, 8, are often mistaken for twins, but they certainly are not. Belgia is affectionate, an artist, and loving. Belkis is great at doing her chores, a good friend, and has a wonderful laugh. It has been a joy to watch them find their place at the Finca and an even greater gift getting to know them individually.

May 1st is Dia del Trabajador in Honduras or the Day of the Worker. It is celebrated by most by being given the day off of work and that is exactly how our well-deserving teachers and maintenance workers celebrated. However, one of our extremely hard-working mothers pointed out to me respectfully that our house moms and tias work every day in the houses and they never get a “free” day off without taking a vacation day. Point well made! Being a mom of your own kids, let alone 5-7 additional kids, is indeed work worthy of a day off. So, a fellow volunteer and myself organized a day of rest and relaxation for all of our female workers at the Finca. All of our house moms, tias, all three of our sisters of St. Francis, and several of our female volunteers spent an entire day relaxing by a beautiful river/swimming hole, talking, swimming, eating, and laughing. It was a wonderful day of celebrating our female community at the Finca. A huge thanks was due to all of our house dads and several of our male volunteers for literally taking over the Finca and caring for our kids for the day!

At the end of May, my brother, Derek, his girlfriend, Mallori, and a very dear family friend, Dale (aka Ducky) came to visit me in Honduras. They spent 4 days getting to know the Finca and our kids. Some highlights included spending an afternoon swimming with 3 of my girls, watching a soccer game, baking cookies for the entire Finca, going on a hike and getting a bit lost, and cooking dinner for my community on the fogon. Afterwards, I officially went on vacation and we traveled our way across the Northern Coast of Honduras. We went snorkeling at Cayos Cochinos (a beautiful series of 13 islands off the coast of Honduras), flew down a mountain side on a zip-line, and spent a couple days relaxing on the beach. It was wonderful to share the Finca and my Honduran experience with my family and a huge Spanish-skills-confidence-booster to fool them into thinking I actually know all I need to about Spanish!

These are only a few highlights of the past months, but I could write forever. Overall, these past few months have been very good, and I am everyday feeling more and more comfortable and at home at the Finca. These past couple of weeks of vacation have been so wonderful and were needed. But, I feel confident that as I head back to the Finca next week, I will travel with a ready and willing anxiousness to be back with my community and my kids in Honduras. I think I will be much more at ease when I return as I know my Spanish is ever-improving, my relationships with my kids are deepening, and I now feel my two worlds are somewhat connected!